Enchantress of Paris- Marci Jefferson

Reviewing a free unpublished copy from NetGalley.

The only redeeming factor of this book is the last chapter. Besides the bittersweet ending and the cliché yet cute closing line this book is an absolute waste of paper and electricity for those reading on e-devices.

The book's main genre is YA, not historical fiction as it's marketed. Primarily, this is the story if an annoying girl in love with a spoilt POS King. That's it. That's the story, thank you for reading 350 pages of nothing. The End.

Despicable characters and repetitive chapters make for an extremely boring read. I couldn't care less about what happened to either the King or Marie because they're horrible people. The only reason I plowed through is to publish my review for NetGalley.

Republish this book as a Y.A., sell it to sappy teenagers and you'll have a winner. Historical Fiction? I don't think so.

The Gathering Storm: Wheel of Time Book 12- Robert Jordan

Re-read.

Oh.My.God. What an emotional roller coaster! I've fallen in love with this series all over again. I've forgotten how amazing this installment was. This installment is equivalent to finding water in the desert. After 11 books of world building and plot twisting we have a climax. This is the turning point in the series, the last 2 books serve as a resolution. What a book! I read the bulk of it while on holiday and I spent all the train/plane rides either crying, laughing or talking to myself in excitement. Oh wow.

You can tell that the writing has been altered. Sanderson has a younger more straightforward voice but kudos to him for maintaining the essence of WOT. I LOVE RJ, he created WOT for us and I'm a die-hard fan but I must say that Sanderson taking it over worked out really really well.

This is non-stop action, things are moving along with EVERYONE. Egwene's plot is kick-ass. I decided if they ever got this series on TV, I'm auditioning for Egwene's role. And Rand.. ah Rand.. all I can say is ABOUT FREAKIN TIME! I'm really surprised that the first time I read this, the implications of Rand's emo-ness totally went over my head, I mean it's so glaringly obvious.. how did I not see it?! Now I understand though and big claps for Jordan once again.

I'm just so overwhelmed and really sad that I have one more book to go before I finish my re-read and reach the final book.

I don't want to let go.. what will I do with the rest of my life!?!

This is Where I leave you - Jonathan Tropper

A well written witty book about a dysfunctional family. Great array of characters and lots of dark funny moments.

Everyone can probably relate to this book on some level because really, what family isn't fucked up somehow?

Before I go to Sleep- S.J. Watson

Bullshit story.

2 stars for managing to creep me out in some instances. Other than that....



I can't really say much without ruining the book so I'll try for basics.

First 10% of the book was great. It started with a catchy chapter and an interesting premise. The next 80% was an amnesiac's diary. An amnesiac who forgets her life every day.. Basically, every chapter was a recount of all the chapters before with a bit of added info at the end. 



Just get on with it FFS!! 

The ending was not worth living through the redundant chapters. Oh my god. The ending was so embarrassing. Have you ever watched a straight to video thriller? Like Abandon or House at the End of the Street? Cheesy, crappy thrillers with a bad dialogue and a cringe ending. That sums up this book. No wonder it was made into a movie, it screams lame thriller. So the author tried to throw in clues about the ending in the form of red herrings. You knew how it would end, but your brain kept fighting against it because it was sooo fucking retarded. You read on, hoping, no, praying that you are wrong and the author can't possibly be that bad. Can't be possible... but it is.. it is possible. Watson clearly has no clue about amnesia as a medical condition or about how real life works in general. So you read on shaking your head in disbelief and eventually laugh at the absurdity of it all. Then you double check the rating on goodreads and you shake your head some more. 

Eventually, you sell the paperback, delete the audio/e-book and develop a select type pf amnesia that deletes this story permanently from your brain.

The Night Circus-Erin Morgenstern

I don't have much to say about this book except that the cover always made me think that the story was about a little girl. The circus looks like a little doll like child sitting on a hand. The clock is the face, the red swirly things at the top look like a bonnet, the ones on the bottom are her legs, the circus tents make up her dress and arms. That's not what it was about though, it was actually about a circus.. hahaha.. surprise!

This book was just ok, whatever, I really can't be bothered to think about it. The circus was cool, I wanted to visit it, it was very well written, there was an inkling in time when I felt for the characters and their miseries but yeah, whatever. I wasn't impressed with the ending, it was a bit shit and I wasn't blown away or in love with the book. 

An average book that accomplishes it's purpose and sells copies

Fishbowl- Bradley Somer

This is a review of an unpublished version I received for free through NetGalley.

Interesting book. It's supposed to be a story about a fish falling from a building, but it's not really. In fact, the fish wasn't all that necessary except to make this book a bit different then every other book about people and their lives. 

This is a book about people in a building, it gives us a very brief glimpse into their lives (about an hour to be exact) and it's pretty cool because the characters are engaging, the way the chapters alternate POV's keeps it fresh and the fact that we go back in time to witness the same event from a different characters perspective just makes the whole story tight. 

It's a good attempt but would be great if the author got rid off/fixed the following:

Strange Metaphors 

Wow, this guy was trying too hard with the figures of speech. As the story moved along I got engrossed in the narrative and didn't pay much attention to the rest of the stuff, but starting out I was just thought wtf, when I read sentences like:

He wears the look of how a loved one's embrace feels 

Huh!!? Does he mean: He looks as though he's being embraced by a loved one?? How can one look like a loved one's embrace feels?!?! 

OR

If he could, Ian would wonder on the beautiful and quantifiable order that gravity imposes on the chaos of the world, the harmony of a marriage between a constant acceleration and an ultimate speed that all objects in free fall reach but don't breach. Is this universal number divine or simply physics, and if it's the latter, could it be the work of the former?



Then there is:

Unlike most men, Connor is an amazingly sensual dancer, his body seeming to respond to her feelings

One more for the road:

He's busily learning more about less 



WTF words 

The author's Aussie and some words were just a big Huh for me. Apparently rooting in Australia is having sex O.o. Lord knows what hexaped means. Bimaniacal anyone? I'm pretty sure that's not a real word. 

Repetitive writing 

Some of the writing was very repetitive, both in terms of events and actual words. This might have been used as a writing style but it wasn't effective 

Children's book writing style 

Not sure if they will be fixing this by the time the final edition comes out but it is EVERYWHERE. Short, clipped, simple sentences, you know, things like: Jenna is a pretty girl. She likes eating apples. Jenna knew someday her fondness of apples would lead her to greatness. Editor.Now. 

Claire the Shut-in 

Wow. Just wow. First of all, I am HOPING that this is just a coincidence, but Claire the shut-in is an exact copy of a character from a book called Shoeaholic Anonymous. It's a crappy book that no ones probably ever heard of, which makes it a great source of character forgery. However, I'm giving Bradley the benefit of the doubt and chalking it all up to coincidence. This is the similarity: Both characters are agoraphobics who have been shut in their apartments for god know show long and never leave it. They live alone and rely on the internet. To make money, they both operate as phone sex operators.... You can see why I was a bit taken aback. But whatever, two writers can come up with the exact same character coincidentally..it COULD happen. 

In all cases, this character was just WRONG. She did not make any psychological sense. One does not become an agoraphobic simply because they realize they don't need any of their friends.. that just doesn't happen. Also, if one is already established as agoraphobic in a book one does not suddenly invite a strange man into one's home!




Ah! That's all I can be bothered to share for now, sleeping time! But seriously, I read the book in 3 days because it was really entertaining. All the stuff I mentioned above where things I noted in the first 50 pages of the book because after that I was too intrigued by the story to notice anymore. So good job Bradley, I hope the published version fixes some of the kinks above.

Knife of Dreams: Wheel of Time Book 11 - Robert Jordan

Third Re-Read

Aaaand we're back on track my fellow WOT-ers! after 3 books of whining female channelers, running after Faile, having to read Shaido chapters and scratching our heads at Halima's purpose, Knife of Dreams has swooped in to save the day and wrap up some undesirable plots! Yee haw!

I'm pleased to say that Perrin has his Falcon back, thank the lord Jesus, Elayne has sorted out her shit at long last and Egwene's plot has gone into motion after being stuck with those old farts for what feels like eons. We don't see that much of Rand and his brooding, which is fine by me. Thankfully that is going to be resolved soon and we can all breathe a sigh of relief that we don't have to deal with the Emo Child any longer. Mat is unfortunately now hitched to that little psychopath ( I repeat, biggest mismatch of the series) but his chapters were still as entertaining as ever. 

This was a great book with tons of action and plot movement/development as well as one of my all time favorite chapters in the series (Lan and Nynaeve). I love those two, hands down my fave couple.

Two more books to go before the end.... :( :( I don't want to let go.