Tuesday, June 30, 2015

Blackmoore- Julianne Donaldson

I am disappoint.

This is not what I signed up for. I read Donaldson's first book Edenbrooke last year and I recall being blown away by it. Now I'm thinking I might have been delusional back then. This is supposed to be a clean adult romantic novel set in Victorian London. Adult novel means that the plot is going to be well developed and the characters are going to be mature. Sadly, this was not the case.

Main Issues with the book:

Horrible Female Characters 

How is it possible that every single lady in this novel, besides the protagonist, Kate, is a complete bitch. Every single one, I promise..
Let me introduce you to the Mean Girls

Kate's Mother and Sisters 

Oh my dear lord. In a nutshell, Kate's mother is a whore who entrapped her husband and proceeded to make his life a living hell. She now takes EVERY CHANCE SHE GETS to flirt with boys half her age, it is implied that she takes things further than just flirting. Eleanor, Kate's eldest sister, follows in her mother's footsteps and causes several scandals in London. Maria, the 3rd sister, is briefly mentioned and is portrayed as a brainless pathetic creature who just trails after the mother. As if that wasn't enough, Kate's mother treats Kate like shit the whole time, even going so far as throwing a hairbrush at her.. yes, very believable and mature. Bottom line, she's the mother from hell. Ok now, smile for mommy!

Sylvia Delafield- Kate's "Bestfriend"

I say "Bestfriend" in quotations because if this is friendship I'd prefer to surround myself with enemies. What a piece of shit. So this girl is absolutely useless, she's a spoiled little shit who can't even walk around in her house because it is " oh so tiring". She spends the entire book pointing out all the negative traits in Kate. Why!?

Mrs. Delafield- Sylvia and Henry's (guy protagonist) mother 

Wow, this character takes the cake. What an evil, psychotic, manipulative ice queen. She despises Kate, pretty much cause she comes from a family of hoes and takes every chance to remind her of how hated she is. Too much negativity.

Ms. Saint Claire 

This is the girl the Mrs. Delafield has picked out for Henry. She's disgusting. Kate goes on and on about how thoughtful and perfect Ms. Saint Claire is, but really she's a bitch. She insults Kate all the time by saying things like "oh, I heard that you have a horrible mother, you poor thing, I feel so sorry for you." I'm sorry... how is that thoughtful?!?!?! I just wanted to vomit all over her face.

Surrounded by all those mean girls we have Kate Worthington:

No one understands me, boo hoo boo hoo. I don't want to be like my mother and sisters, they're all sluts, I hate them, boo hoo. I want to be a spinster and run off to India because I'm 17 years old and heartbroken. As if I even know what that means. If I lived in the 21st century I would be cutting my wrists right now and drawing voodoo doll figures on my notebooks.

Kate's obsession with Blackmoore

Every summer Henry and Sylvia go to their country estate Blackmoore. Kate isn't invited because their mother hates Kate's guts. Now any normal human being would not want to go somewhere they are unwanted, right? WRONG. Kate is OBSESSED with going to Blackmoore. She throws tantrums every single summer when her friends go. Are we meant to feel sorry for her? I just think it's FUCKING WEIRD.

Clearly, this girl needs new friends or a therapist. 

Repetitive Writing 

"My hand crept up my neck" was repeated at least 3 times.
"I could feel Henry standing behind me" was repeated at least 4 times, sometimes on the same page.
"I must go to India"- Repeated a 1000000000000 times.
There was endless talk about Birds and being trapped in a cage and then some more birds. We later discover that Henry gave Kate a book about Birds, maybe this is supposed to show us her love for him? I don't know. Enough with the freakin birds.


The British Dream! Feeling victimized and hopeless, Kate convinces herself that the only way to go is jetting off to India with her spinster Aunt Charlotte. Riiight, because sailing to a land colonized by the Brits who's people have been forced to "reform" and follow British rule is SUCH a great adventure! That's just sick man. 

This book read like a Young Adult novel, with juvenile characters and melodramatic OTT scenes. Not my cup of tea, would recommend it for Y.A. fans. 

Saturday, June 20, 2015

One Grave at a Time (Night Huntrees book #6)- Jeaniene Frost

I write this review with a heavy heart. I LOVE Cat and Bones.They're the cutest couple out there. But their story should have ended 2 books back. 

The first 2 books were vital for the story and super amazing. The 3rd book was a filler but at least provided us with a backstory on Mencheres. 4th book was far fetched but gave us a conclusion to Cat's dilemma. That's it. Why didn't you just quit while you were ahead Jeaniene? We're able to stomach a 5th book but no more! 

Having run out of adversaries for Cat (Vampires first then ghouls), Frost created a threat in the form of a ghost.... 

Sirius is not impressed either.

The extremely random plot introduces Elizabeth, Fabian's old ghost friend, who tells Cat & Bones about the ghost of the evil witch hunter that killed her, Heinrich Kramer. Apparently Kramer torments people all year long until he becomes solid on Halloween, which is when he selects 3 women to shun as witches and burn at the stake. Oh, and this has been happening for years.

Are you telling me, that in world infested with Vampires and Ghouls who believe ghosts are harmless, NO ONE noticed that there is a very powerful ghost that has been floating around for centuries? Also, why would Elizabeth wait this long to seek help? Why didn't she go to the Voodoo Queen a hundred of years ago? 

It's not that bad of a plot compared to other shit out there but it's trying too hard. There really is not much more to add to Cat & Bone's story and this is a desperate attempt to keep them alive. The side plot was super lame as well, not gonna even get into that. Sadly, the subplot sets up the story line for book number 7. Surprise, Surprise, this time the threat is human! Vampires, check. Ghouls, check. Ghosts, check. Ah, yes! I haven't thrown human threats at Cat & Bones yet, let's try doing that! Ugh. I would have quit at book 6 but book 7 is the last book, so might as well. #Firstworldproblems

Another sign of desperation is the increased sex scenes. Cat & Bones relationship is awesome and super cute. However, we don't need added steamy scenes between them to convince us that they are still going strong. Again, they just served as page fillers and a respite from the boring plot. 

As heartbreaking as it is, this series is long over due an ending. On a positive note, the spin off books are great, so that's something to look forward to.

Sunday, June 14, 2015

Sons of Anarchy- Season 1

When I was a kid, one of the things I wanted to be when I grew up was a motorcycle club member. I romanticized it in my head, never mind that I'm scared shitless of motorbikes, I dreamed about the leather jackets, helmet donned over my pretend waist length black hair, bad boys with 6 packs, me zooming down the road on my badass motorcycle (I know nothing about bikes, but that didn't hinder me). Then I grew up and realized there were 2 types of Motorcycle Clubs; the actual outlaws that consist of mostly fat white trash or the wanabes with well paying day jobs who drive around together on the weekend and hang out at Starbucks. I was crushed. Not as much as when I found out that Pirated where actually dangerous somalis that you don't want to fuck with and not replicas of Johny Dep in Pirates of the Caribbean, but my little heart broke a little none the less.

Sons of Anarchy has given me the chance to retreat back into my fairytale world where crime is cool and bikers are the shit. The show is set in a town called Charming.. lol.. ruled by the outlaw club SAMCRO (Sons of Anarchy Motorcycle Club, Redwood Original). Let the badassery begin!


Charlie Hunnam as Jax Teller

The main protagonist, Jax is the Vice President of the club, second to his stepfather who took over the club after Jax's father died. Jax is the show's best and worst character. Why? Because he's unreal. Surrounded by scumbags, Jax is the NICEST guy on the show. No, you don't get it. His junkie wife OD's when pregnant with their child and almost kills their baby and he visits her everyday and tells her everything is going to be ok... say whhaatt? Combine that with the fact that EVERYONE else in the show is a complete piece of shit and you know something isn't right. This character was created to be loved by the audience. The writer wants you to side with him, feel for him and like him. They might be trying a bit too hard though because sometimes his niceness just doesn't make sense. That being said, I totally fell for that trap. I'm on team Jax and he propels this show's success IMO, at least in this season. 

Ron Perlman as Clay Morrow

Jax's stepfather and SAMCRO's (the club) President. He's got a sledgehammer for a face, no wonder he played the Beast on Beauty and the Beast (TV show). Anyway, once you get past the face and some of his piece of shit moves, you realize that this is a true leader and true leaders sometimes have to make tough decisions. I respect, even if I do not agree, with Clay's character. He's a guy that's trying to protect his club and his people in anyway he knows how and sometimes he just fuck ups but he has to move on for the rest of the club.

Kim Coates as Tig Trager

I HATE this guy. Biggest asshole out of the whole lot. I guess Coates does a good job with this character cause he incites in me such murderous notions. Wow, what a dickhead. This is your typical brawn over brains character. Thinks the solution to everything is murder and violence. He's the cause of 50% of the trouble within the club since he's such a fire fueler and all he does is spread his venomous and paranoid thoughts on to Clay. Hate this guy!

The rest of the club is divided into the oldies who usually take Clay's and Tig's side and the young ones who seem to share some of Jax's milder, less murderous personality. While they contribute massively to the plot, they don't really matter that much as the show is more about Jax and how the MC affects him rather than vice versa. 

Katey Segal as Gemma Teller Morrow

Katey Segal, better known for her role as Peggy in Married with Children. It's not a massive change. As Peggy she's a manipulative harmless bitch in a sitcom and as Gemma she's a manipulative harmful bitch in a drama. Gemma's Jax's mother and her sole purpose is to keep him from straying from the club. I'm not sure if this is for his or her sake. She's not a very pleasant character in all cases. Katey's a good choice for this character as she just generally has a bitch face and pulls off badassery to a T. 

Maggie Siff as Tara Knowles

What a whore. Jax's ex-girlfriend who ran off alone to Chicago 10 years ago after failing to convince Jax to come away with her. She shows up out of the blue, now a doctor, claiming that she just got a good job in Charming. Liar. She came back cause she was running away from someone and knew Jax would protect her. User. And of course, as Jax is set up to be the Martyr who's good to everyone, he helps her. I don't like her! She also has a constant furrowed brow look that I want to punch off her face.

There are a bunch of other characters like Jax's wife, the corrupt police officers, the good police officers and the ATF agents but I don't care about them.


The way I see it, there are 2 main parallel plots. The first is Jax's inner struggle with the club. There's not much backstory on that, which sucks. All we know is: Jax's baby was born in the pilot and he found a manuscript his dad wrote about his dreams for a lawful Motorcycle club. After that, Jax clashes with Clay about a number of things and tries to deal with stuff in the most peaceful manner. The other clubbers throw comments about him changing after his baby was born. So was Jax a heartless bastard before the Pilot?! Cause from his actions, I get the impression that he's always been a sweetheart. So a bit confused there, but meh, will forgo this. The second plot is the romance soap opera drama cliche. Whyyyyy, why do they have to do this to perfectly good shows?!?! Introduce stupid love triangles and romantic conspiracy theories. It was enough that they had Tara show up and stressed Jax's feelings towards her but why the convoluted plots involving his soon to be x-wife?! This isn't a soap opera, it's a gangster show god damn it! The first plot line is worth putting up with the lame shit though, so we're all good.

The Good Stuff

  • Insane Soundtrack. This might look like an insignificant thing, but putting on the right song to accompany a scene just makes it a 100 times more effective. Love the soundtrack 
  • Well cast main character. Katey Sagal and Ryan Hurst got Golden Globes in 2011 on their performances. I did not see an award winning acting yet though, so maybe it's upcoming. 
  • I'm such a sucker for Bad Boy/Good Girl romances. So while I think Tara needs to crawl into a hole and die, I still enjoy the interactions particularly when Jax says things like this:
"You wanna know how many women I slept with over the past 10 years? Hundreds, maybe more, I don't know. I barely see their faces. I married Wendy cause I was lonely. Because I got tired of the endless disconnect. It was just a sad time out. Because when I'm inside someone there's only one face I see. When you came home it was like some kind of sign to me, like my past coming around giving me another shot to do this different, better. Now that chance is running back to Chicago."

It may not sound as romantic in writing, but TRUST ME, you had to be there to truly appreciate it!!!

The Not So Good Stuff

  • As I mentioned above, it's mostly all about Jax. I mean I don't mind watching Jax but I like shows/literature that can build on more than one character at once. Other characters start to seem flat and single minded when you put all your efforts into one person. Especially for a show that's supposed to center around a club containing many people. Don't get me wrong, there's character development all round but it could have been more refined.
  • Gemma's mystical powers. This is a handle that the writers rely on way too much. An extremely "observant character" ferreting out stuff to help move the plot along. It's good if used properly but they pushed it with Gemma. 
          Example 1: Gemma looks in Tara's bag and finds a gun. She then sees Tara at the fair looking             distressed. With her laser vision, she figures out EXACTLY who Tara is looking at in the split           second before Tara turns away and instantly suspects that this is someone Tara wants to protect           herself from. Hence, the gun.

  • The Mayans. A rival MC comprised of horrible actors. So much cringe. There are tons of Mexicans in Cali, I'm sure they could have found hundreds of better actors then the robots they cast.
This was a good first season. Started very slow, but by the last couple of episodes, I was hooked. I found myself pulling out my laptop at 3 am in the morning after coming back from a late night out to finish watching an episode. Now that is dedication! I guess I will be watching the second season, even after I ruined the whole show for myself by accidentally finding out what happens in the end.. Spacktard, I know :(. 

Thursday, June 11, 2015

Me and My Shadow (Silver Dragons Book 3) - Katie MacAlister

I wanted to give this book a 2 star. There were some scenes that deserved a 1 star. In the end the complete absurdity of it all just made me laugh rather than frustrating me.

This series is just too ridiculous. The characters dialogue and actions have been on repeat for all the 3 books.

May and Gabriel:

Run around looking for objects, pause to have sex, contemplate having foreplay, it doesn't work out, proceed with sex, run around some more.


I'm so pregnant the baby is almost a year old




I'm so broody, I'm so moody, no one understands me. I'm supposed to be a thousand years old, but I act like a teenager. I'm a Black Dragon god damn it and want to be recognized as one! *Throws Tantrum*


Whines and throws tantrums with Kostya. "Surprisingly" they end up together.


One minute it's:

The next it's:


I'm supposed to be comic relief, but really everyone else is so silly that I just come off as annoying


Am I Baltic? Am I someone else? Who am I? Can you guess? Hee Hee. I'm a dragon mage hybrid creature that can do all sorts of awesome tricks but I lose at the end anyway, cause, you know, good guys always win. And I'm kinda lame.

Everyone else:

We're not sure why we're here, but we'll try to be as obnoxious as the rest, just cause

And they all live happily ever af..... Wait... Hold on! But of course, a cliffhanger to set up the story line for the next series (Light Dragons). Tum da daaaaa!

It is really stupid. But I didn't expect anything else and it did entertain me somewhat. So meh, it can have the 3 stars.